Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Rise Above

Your Rejections                                              

                        "Alona rise above your rejections!", counselled the guidance  counsellor   in  her school. Alona is a 20 year old girl graduating in a political science degree,  who is very  unstable  and making decisions is the  most difficult thing to do.  Actually she doesn't want her course,    it       is her mother's choice for her.  She wants to pursue a cooking course.  She believes all decisions     for her life belong solely to her mother  who is an attorney-at-law and  is  very  particular  with every minute thing especially the school performance of her daughter.  She has never been  satisfied with her bring home grades and always suspects her a lot. Friends are not allowed either.

                         This is Alona's home life which affects her whole personality.  She believes in all  the negative comments her mother often berates her.  She accepted all the name calling like 'a daughter of no worth'; 'a dumb girl forever'; 'an ugly child whom no man will ever love'..these and more.  She is never allowed to reason out let alone answer back.  All her mom's statements are final and rules to be followed without questions.  All her mind, emotions and will are controlled by her mean and unhappy mother.  She tells all horrific stories about people just to shun her away from making friends.   Alona knows  her  classmates have freedom because they  look happy and they are proud of their parents.
                                                                                                                            Alona often visits the school guidance counselor who understands her situation.    She tells her, that is emotional abuse and repression to her freedom.  She does not live to get        an approval from her mother but her love and support must be unconditional. The children are not slaves but member of a family that love is voluntary and where home is a comfort zone.  It is the parents    duty to give all the basic needs, love and education to their children without expecting anything in return.  The guidance counselor prays very hard for Alona to  understand and have the courage to reject all the verbal abuse her mother often throws at her.  Alona admitted that she is very unhappy with her home life and is very fearful every time she comes face to face with her mother yet she finds herself just obeying and  wishes to please her.

The guidance counselor presented to Alona different cases and situation that    may happen. She praises Alona for her kindness and assures her, she's pretty!  She asked Alona, what if her mother dies, can she live without her decisions? How  will she learn to manage relationships if she has no friends to share with for fear of rejection and embarrassment her mother will cause to them?  Will she also want  to do to her own children in  the future what she allows her mother to brainwash her own daughter?   They learned that her mother was abandoned by her father when she was very small.  She also was raised by an aunt because of a broken marriage by her parents.  These triggered her unhappy life and because of hatred she finished the law school to show her strength and abilities.  Her own insecurities and  personal fear drove her to shelter her daughter from pains and life's sufferings, but ended bringing all those sorts to her.  Poor Alona!  The decision is left to her.                           
                           It was the most surprising thing when Alona refused to go home after her class.
She stopped going to school, she hid to her aunt who understands what she is going through.
The following week was a heart breaking scene for mother and daughter who are so strange with
each other. Finally, Alona's mother repented and asked sorry from her, but 20 years of that share
of life is not easy to break. Alona needs help from her aunt who guides her to forgive and starts life in God slowly, with faith and joy in each victory.  She left her home to study Hotel & Restaurant Management but Alona writes in her journal, restoring her life is not easy.  It takes a power greater than her and love beyond her capabilities...

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