Thursday, December 22, 2011

Bon Voyage & Till We Meet Again

Remembering the man who lived on May 17, 1957 until December 16, 2006 

This is what happened to my most beloved man, next to my salvation I always thank God he is that man for me, my better half. This blog I dedicate to him as I remember the time of his departure to glory.  Let me talk as if directly to him.

It is so amazing that your birthday coincides with your grandmother, your rector and your mom-in-law(my mom), no wonder you got a unique bonding among them. You eagerly went home after nearly 10 years from studying abroad to take care of your ailing mother knowing that you can have a better life if you waited for a resident position there. This got a great commendation in my heart for you.  Your mom told me this and saw it with my two eyes. You were there prince at home being the youngest and the only son. She asked for a son to serve Him full time. Until your High School you were closely and lovingly cared for. However in college, away from home a million miles,  you became a work scholar. You were assigned in the kitchen and cleaner of the hallway. Your exact height-  was it 5 ft tall (oh boy) and the pots and pans were way taller than you? you've got to wash them several times a day.  You were reprimanded because the first time you used the push broom you used it like the hard broom way back in our country. I laughed with tears rolling down my face. However, those hard days made you the exact man God molded to do His work in this part of the globe. This page will not accommodate if I will enumerate your insurmountable hardships  in your college and post graduate life that you said many instances you wanted to give up. Then several men of God encouraged and helped you adjust until you were able  and became exceptional with your studies too. Well, I happened to read one letter from your professor back in your Florida school in college. Added to that was your chancellor's gift to you and your classmates for a  free trip to the land of Israel particularly in the town of Bethlehem and Galilee.  You said you were challenged to follow the steps of Jesus, being humble and obscure in His omniscience. 
                                                                                                                                                         God gave you and me 3 wonderful kids. You were very hands on in caring and keeping them grow up in an environment of safe and where true learning takes place. You evangelize them over and over making sure they understand and believe the Gospel. You encouraged them to become medical doctors. You influenced them in the field of music and deep studies of the Bible.  You showed us that life is hard but laughter is free. Attitude is what matters most you said.   I love that and saw your concern for people. There is not one person who can get inside the house without hearing the Gospel even students. You were so concern with the young  people, the children, the adults, the widows and orphans. When at night you recognized the drunk on the road you accompanied them safely to their home not minding the smell of their vomits spread on your shirt. When you passed by a person depressed with their vehicle that broke down on the highway, you were towing them to the nearest mechanic shop. You said perhaps there is a way for you to share the Gospel if they are seekers of God. At home, your personal study was incomparable. A library of more than 3000 books was enough to occupy the day when you stay at home reading, studying, researching.  This got a great impact on the young minds of our children, their love for reading and challenging themselves for deeper knowledge is noteworthy.  This opened my life also to increase in learning and to pursue truth that changes lives.

 Studies at home, family fun, church, camps and seminars during school vacations. You showed great leadership.  You freely shared your skills, talents and resources actively as you expect others to offer their God given potentials as well.  You challenged me to just offer my best for God, studying because you said one day I will understand my spiritual gift and God will develop me according to His plan if I am fully surrendered to Him. Wait! you also had many weaknesses like being impatient when people were not following rules in a certain place.  You were irritated with drivers who blows horn very loud and others. This was our life before you became ill.  In all those times I never heard you complained. I will just hear your feelings when you describe them to the doctors as they get history of your health and were trying to diagnose on you.  One time you were misdiagnosed. It was still far from my mind that you were leaving for glory.  Your preaching and teaching on those times became intense reminding us that Heaven is real. That we will see Christ face to face and will spend a million years in awe of His majesty. 

Eight months before that December your doctor finally came up with the biopsy result, it was cancer.  Yours was a fatty liver organ. What a shock! Yes, it can happen to people with zero content of any alcoholic drink. You never had cirrhosis. The doctors declared maybe it is because of too much oily food especially from street foods, genetics or an exposure to some radiation. We can never be certain about this. The funny side is that you were more than eager to see the beauty of the second life. Your prayer was to take you home with God before you will lose weight and people might not recognize your frail body. You shared with some friends your excitement to go but your worry was me, a weak wife because I could not bear to see you go and I wont. I pleaded with God. However on 16th December 2006, God answered your prayer.  After twice revived by electric shock, I came to my mind and gave you up to Him who made you and who can love you better than I.  You still managed to give a smile with tears rolling your eyes when you heard my voice giving you back to God and thanking Him for sharing you with me.  I promised you,  I will manage and help the kids grow  well.  I praise God for the strength and guidance on that day onward.

                                                  2:10 AM you were declared gone to eternity. I saw your body wrapped in white cloth right in front of me and your sister. How good she was to read the Bible all throughout that night. I thank my friend who accompanied you to the morgue but Oh I asked the hospital not to place you in their freezer.  More friends joined me to bring you to the funeral parlor to wash and embalm your body. At 4:00 AM while I was waiting for the cashier, the hospital office played the song, "It's Christmas my love, I am looking for you and missing..." (Pasko na sinta ko in our dialect). Outside, I know it was one sunny day but all the colors I saw was literally gray everywhere.  I could not explain but emotions change senses as I experienced it but then I asked God for grace to keep my mind sane and working. That happened! The influx of many friends and loved ones and their messages from God's word brought comfort to me and our children.  I finally realized that you are indeed completely healed by God, free from pain, from problems and earthly concerns. Indeed what an answer to our prayers!
Now it's been 5 years. We have moved on by God's grace. Your desire and prayers for us are almost tangible. Faith is substance according to Hebrews.  I don't stop missing you and thank God for you.  Someday we'll see you there, can you meet me at the front door?

We met in 1984, became very good and best friends in 1985, became
lovers and engaged in 1986 and finally tie the knot in 1987. Our lives together was not perfect on a daily basis but majority of our days together were perfectly great. He is a so funny guy being full of humor and gentleness. We agreed that our first love would be God and to serve Him in a ministry He initiated for us.  We also agreed to give preference to each other and speak our minds out in a constructive way as much as we can. Let this find something a little worthwhile to those who may drop by and read..


  1. "Life is hard but laughter is free. Attitude is what matters most." ---> this is my favorite line in the post... I miss Pastor Dan...

    Nice post mam nel... ^__^

  2. thanks nurse, i thought i will no longer cry, but tears still flow but of course no regrets... he's in a better place. God is with us and you are our friend. Hugs!